Love Letter From An Eveready Man

 If my first letter was a confession of the pain we carried,
let this one be a celebration of the love I now hold,
clear, conscious, and grounded in truth.

I once loved you from a place of fear,
fear of loss, fear of not being enough, fear of being unchosen.
But today, I love you from a place of peace.

Sayang, I've met myself.
In the silence, in the tears, in the spaces where you weren’t,
I found the boy I abandoned long ago,
and I finally gave him what he needed,
safety, acceptance, unconditional love.

I don’t chase anymore.
I don’t perform.
I don’t plead for love with empty hands and a tired heart.

I come to you now as a man who is full.
Full of self-respect, full of clarity, full of devotion for you.
Not because I need you to complete me,
but because I want to walk beside you,
not as your rescuer, not as your project,
but as your equal, your partner, your witness in this life.

I see you now, sayang.
Not through the lens of my longing,
but through the eyes of someone who knows how to truly love.
I honor the woman you are,
not the version I imagined you had to be for me to feel safe.

I’m here to love you, patiently, consciously, and honestly.
And if you'll let me...

I want to build a new love with you,
not from survival, but from a place of care and tenderness.
Not from fear, but from freedom.
Not from pain, but from presence.

You've always been my everything Sayang,
but now I know how to love you without losing myself.
And that, more than anything,
is the love you’ve always deserved.

With all of me,
The man who is finally ready to love you right.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Becoming The MONSTER I Hated

      I lay this down so I can own my wrong doing. I'm slowly becoming a better man, servant of God, husband, lover, father, brother and son. I'm humble enough to expose myself to the world so I can serve as a living life lesson everyone out there planning to "merajuk dengan Allah" and take the easy way out because growing internally and spiritually is not easy. To my wife Aina, I love you so much and I want you to know that all this changes I made, is beneficial for me and in return will overflow to you and Lily. I'm becoming the man you deserve.      The reason why I titled the previous post as the wasted 2nd chance is because I could have just stopped whatever nonsense that we have been doing and focussed on marriage life. I think hard on why that is not the case and I think I can at least tell from my end. I love Aina deeply and I was under the assumption that she loves me because she can be herself and explore all this dark side while I protect her. At...
Read more

The Downfall Before The Pheonix Rise.

      To start off I will need to give a little context on my past, I used to be married to my ex wife Leen from 2007 up till 2020. She's my first love and I highlighted this as this will be a cause of a lot of my headache which I will elaborate in a while.     The marriage was OK, as expected, responsibility and what not. We welcomed 3 boys, the amount of children she wanted because she was raised in a single child family and very vocal of not wanting to only have 1 child because she say it's a lonely upbringing. We got married quite early, I was 20 and she was 21 when we got married. I was under the impression we have enough time to have children at a later age but she insist after a year or so to have at least 1 baby 1st. We welcome our 1st born in 2009.     We have our 1st place in a rundown walk up apartment, 3rd floor. It was small but we're happy. That was until 2015 where I started to realized that I didn't accomplished anything much outside of...
Read more

Breaking The Cycle

      I grew up as the youngest in a family of five siblings. The one closest to me in age was already seven years older, so for most of my childhood, I learned to be alone. While others were busy with their own lives, I played in quiet corners, creating my own worlds. I don’t remember being comforted when I cried, or celebrated when I succeeded. I only remember trying, trying to be noticed, trying to be liked.      Over time, I became the “funny one,” the people pleaser. Not because I naturally was, but because I had to be. Earning attention became survival . Laughter became my language to feel seen. I wore smiles like armor, and read every room like it was a battlefield hence the reaosn why I picked up Aina's mood in a glimpse of second of seeing her or meeting her.      And speaking of battlefields, my late dad, Abaji, may Allah bless his soul, was an ex-army. His love was strict. His presence, while firm, was often felt more as pre...
Read more