Mature But Not Spiritually Mature

         As you might already know from past post, I got married extremely early so I'm forced to mature up ahead of people around me with similar age. That combined with all of my siblings that are way older than me with the closest to me being 7 years older than me followed by the elder siblings, have forced me into maturing up beyond my age. At the times where I started paying bills on my own, most of my friends are still staying with their parents, and while most are staying up all night partying, I'm staying up taking care of my son. Not complaining but I'm writing this down so you know that maturity is not an unfamiliar state of mind for me. Responsibility and to be resourceful is something I crave for and enjoy to carry out.

    Now I wanted to press that being forced to mature up doesn't mean I didn't have any side that I am immature. I realize pretty soon that while I carry out whats needed in term of responsibility, I still have an inner child in me that wanted to come out as I was forced to mature up sooner than my brain would like to. Aina brings out this side of me and I just loved it as I can just be myself. 

    That being said, I would like to highlight that worldly maturity doesn't equals to spiritually mature. While I can safely say I'm worldly matured, I didn't notice that I am not spiritually matured. While researching on this topic I can say I can cross everthing in the list below as a trait that can be observed on me externally.

  • Responsible in daily life
  • Makes thoughtful decisions
  • Has empathy and good social skills
  • Handles challenges with wisdom and calm
  • Excels in their career, family life, or personal goals
    People often respect this kind of maturity because it’s visible and useful in worldly success. While spiritually matured is deeper, often more private form of growth. It includes:
  • Being deeply aware of Allah in everyday life (taqwa)
  • Prioritizing the Hereafter over short-term pleasures
  • Having sincere humility, even when successful
  • Responding to tests with patience, not just emotional control
  • Seeking repentance quickly after a mistake, without arrogance or delay
  • Loving, fearing, and trusting Allah more than anything else
    While I can cross off all the point for worldly maturity, I can't do the same with spiritually maturity before. I'm a mess  and I'm happy to say that with all the changes I'm going through now, I can also cross all of the points in spiritually matured list above now. Striving a life with my heart close to Allah, and carry a deep inner peace and purpose.
    
    To simplify it, I handles my life well, responsible for my obligations towards my family and well-liked by people around me but it doesn't reflect on my relationship with Allah. I delay prayers, ignore sins and feel distant from the Qur’an or remembrance (zikir). I trust in my own intellect more than divine guidance making it hard to Tawakkal. You want peace?. Submit and surrender to Allah, be spiritually mature and life will become easier for you.

“The Day when neither wealth nor children will benefit [anyone], but only one who comes to Allah with a sound heart.”
(Qur’an 26:88–89)

    You can be admired by people, yet not right with Allah. Spiritual maturity is about the heart’s alignment with truth and not just outer behavior. And it’s what truly matters in the end.

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